I last saw Dustin Huffman at my Uncle Skeeter's funeral, in October of last year. I marveled at how he had grown and how handsome he was. But then, I hadn't seen him since he was 7 or 8. His Grandma (Helen Huffman, aka Skippy) was my mother's sister. For my mom, who knew him much better, this was a hard loss. To my shame, I barely knew him at all. Yet, I feel his loss. Maybe because he was so young. Maybe because I promised myself that I would strive to include my whole family somehow in my life, but in the back of my mind, I always thought I had time. How could I know I did not? All wrapped up in my own life, I missed knowing a really great kid that, by the stories I am hearing, was just that. A great kid.
My family is not close on my moms side. Her parents died when she was only three. They were the glue that held that family together, and when they were gone, their children went in many different direction. My mom was the baby, and while most of them lived in Salem, my mom ended up down in Calcutta. We barely ever saw them when I was growing up. That continued into our adult lives. I have cousins to my moms siblings that I have not seen in 20 or more years. Despite the fact that Dustin and his family lived in Salem and I lived in Calcutta, we never saw each other. No family reunions or picnics. Nothing.
I regret not knowing this fine young man. What an opportunity I have lost, forever. My Aunt says he truly loved his grandparents and helped them a lot when they were still alive. They mattered to him.
My little family went down to Gretchen's and left some flowers and a note to him, talking about what we had missed in not knowing him. We also left a wreath of flowers at the lookout above Gretchen's. The sadness there is one you can almost touch. I feel like I missed something great. I know I did. I will be thinking of you a while Dustin Huffman. Your Life's Light will be greatly missed.
